From: "Steve Bamford ARC" To: "paetzoldr@gmx.de" References: <000001c41255$6bca59c0$0b33fea9@armada> Subject: Re: Urgent - submission for April fools day - see attached note. Date: Thu, 25 Mar 2004 13:46:52 -0800 MIME-Version: 1.0 Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="----=_NextPart_000_00D9_01C4126F.AE6A7A20" X-Priority: 3 X-MSMail-Priority: Normal X-Unsent: 1 X-MimeOLE: Produced By Microsoft MimeOLE V6.00.2800.1106 This is a multi-part message in MIME format. ------=_NextPart_000_00D9_01C4126F.AE6A7A20 Content-Type: text/plain; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable Hi Ralf, Thanks for sending in your April Fools Day article. It looks very good. = I'll e-mail you when your article goes on ARC. Steve Bamford Aircraft Resource Center http://www.aircraftresourcecenter.com =20 Live like there is no tomorrow; Love like you've never been hurt. Work like you don't need the money. Dance like nobody's watching. Sing like nobody's listening. Live like it's Heaven on Earth. ----- Original Message -----=20 From: Ralf P=E4tzold=20 To: sheb@telus.net=20 Sent: Thursday, March 25, 2004 2:39 AM Subject: Urgent - submission for April fools day - see attached note. Gallery Template Modified 1/48 Tamiyogram=20 F-14 "Cheshire Cats" =20 No-viz paint scheme by Ralf P=E4tzold -------------------- Steve Bamford will insert full sized version of photo Side.jpg = here=20 =20 Historical Background Flashback to 2010: The not-too-exciting "low-viz" paint schemes = adopted by both the USAF and US Navy for their airplanes had shown = itself to be effective in the recent wars against Iraq, Yugoslavia, = Iraq, Iran, North Korea, Iraq, Canada, and the United Nations. Though = popular with neither pilots (who preferred peppier liveries for their = kit) nor modellers (who had grown bored of modelling increasingly = exciting airplanes in the same old grey-in-grey tones), chances were = that the "low-viz" paint scheme was here to stay until the end of the = aircraft area (2032). Then, one day in 2011, a German modeller by the name of Adolf Pr=E4ltz = accidentally discovered that mixing three parts of Future, two parts of = Tamiya clear, one part of Model Master Sealer for Metalizer, ten parts = Vodka, and an unknown quantity of a substance which Mr. Pr=E4ltz has = been barred from disclosing by contractual obligations (see below) = resulted in a coat with the most unusual of properties. The discovery had been accidental, starting out as an impromptu = experiment in the field of synthetic mind-expanding stimulants, which in = turn had been prompted by a high degree of frustration caused by = inability to come to terms with the intricacies of a primitive vintage = aircraft kit (the Academy 1/32 scale F-18 dating back to 2003). The experiment as intended proved entirely successful; however, the = resulting loss of hand-eye coordination led to most of the liquid being = carelessly distributed all over the workbench - with astonishing = results: the offending kit had disappeared altogether, and so had the = workbench. This, in itself, was nothing too unusual for a seasoned connoisseur of = Star Trek reruns and David Lynch movies. What was unusual, though, was = the fact that the aforementioned items remained invisible even after the = effects of the stimulant had worn off. Way cool, man...=20 Initial attempts at exploiting the potential of this discovery were = less than successful. The unsatisfactory outcome of an incident at the = dormitory of a local girls school finally prompted Mr. Pr=E4ltz to cash = in on his invention in a more conventional manner.=20 He contacted a certain Steve B., a known CIA agent running a = modelling web site as a front end - not too clandestine an operation, = though, as the name of the website was an anagram of "Turn for secret = CIA career" (or, as some contend, "Career for secret CIA runt"). With Mr = B. providing the contacts, a deal was quickly struck with the US = Department of Defense (DoD), resulting in the most effective camouflage = scheme in human history since the invention of lip gloss and rouge: the = joint sercives' "no-viz" scheme. The stealthy invention also made its way into other areas of modern = life. A bionic software company called Microbesoft licensed the = technology to incorporate it into its popular word processing = application for neurocomputers, expanding the WYSIWIG (What You See Is = What You Get) principle of earlier programs by adding a feature that had = been on users' wish lists for ages: NYSINYD (Now You See It, Now You = Don't). =20 Steve Bamford will insert full sized version of photo Front.jpg = here=20 =20 The Kit The model is based on the current 1/48 scale Tamiyogram rendition of a = vintage Grumman F-14 "Tomcat" ($ 10.500 / ? 5.000 / RMB 250). It = contains markings for the Squadron Leader's bird of VF-628 "Cheshire = Cats". This may be seen as completely pointless as these markings will = be completely invisible on the finished product (apart from 4 national = insignia on the top, bottom, and left and right hand side); on the other = hand, the "completely invisible" issue has always failed to convince in = some quarters as squadrons of Accurate Miniatures B-25 kits with fully = built-up (and superdetailed) interiors prove. No aftermarket goodies were used except for Manic Details "Late F-14 = Cockpit" (MD-1349234, $ 3.500), Verblinden Follies' "Extended flip-flop = Flap" set (VFFFF-14, $ 15.000), and Floppy Tires' "Floppy F-14 tires" = product (FT-14V, $2.000).=20 This is the second edition of the kit which comes in classic gray = testostyrene (the earlier version of the kit cast in invisible plastic = had met with only a lukewarm reception from modellers, some of whom have = spent ages trying to locate lost parts). Instructions are provided on = the usual 3D holodisc. Construction As is fitting for a shake-and-bake type of kit, I assembled it by = first shaking the whole thing a little, and then baking it in the = Thermoform microwave oven after adding liberal amounts of "Mr. Sticky = 10000". One thing I still don't like about this process is the fact that it = leaves too much manual work for the builder. I wonder why they still = haven't introduced a method which automatically disintegrates the = leftover sprues. =20 Steve Bamford will insert full sized version of photo Oven.jpg = here=20 =20 Painting The assembled model was placed in the Spray-o-Mat and first given a = coat of gloss black acrylic which served as a base for various shades of = Alclad XIV Metalizers to make individual panels stand out. Then, several thin coats of Tamiyogram XF-9001 "Invisible" were = applied. This product does not use the original Pr=E4ltz/DoD formula, = but a less-than-perfect mixture which leaves some residual visibility as = you can see in the enclosed pictures.=20 Rumour has it that the manufacturer of Alclad will soon be releasing a = product called Alviz which is based on the original formula. =20 Steve Bamford will insert full sized version of photo Flying.jpg = here=20 =20 Conclusion Shake-and-bake kits, Thermoform ovens and Spray-o-Mats have taken the = tedium out of modelling. Today even lobotomised chimpanzees can (and = will) produce contest-winning models, which is a good thing as it keeps = them from molesting us while they take time off from running the = government and the economy. Photos and text =A9 2004 by Ralf P=E4tzold ------=_NextPart_000_00D9_01C4126F.AE6A7A20 Content-Type: text/html; charset="iso-8859-1" Content-Transfer-Encoding: quoted-printable
Hi Ralf,
Thanks for sending in = your April=20 Fools Day article.  It looks very good.  I'll e-mail you = when=20 your article goes on ARC.
Steve Bamford
Aircraft Resource Center
http://www.aircraftresourc= ecenter.com
 
Live=20 like there is no tomorrow;
Love like you've never been hurt.
Work = like you=20 don't need the money.
Dance like nobody's watching.
Sing like = nobody's=20 listening.
Live like it's Heaven on Earth.
----- Original Message -----
From:=20 Ralf = P=E4tzold=20
To: sheb@telus.net
Sent: Thursday, March 25, 2004 = 2:39=20 AM
Subject: Urgent - submission = for April=20 fools day - see attached note.

Gallery = Template=20 Modified

1/48 = Tamiyogram=20

F-14=20 "Cheshire=20 Cats" =20

No-viz paint=20 scheme

by Ralf=20 P=E4tzold
--------------------

Steve Bamford=20 will insert full=20 sized version of photo Side.jpg = here=20

 

Historical=20 Background

Flashback = to 2010:=20 The = not-too-exciting "low-viz"=20 paint schemes adopted by both the USAF and US Navy for their airplanes = had=20 shown itself to be effective in the recent wars against Iraq, = Yugoslavia,=20 Iraq, Iran, North Korea, Iraq, Canada, and the United Nations. Though = popular=20 with neither pilots (who preferred peppier liveries for their kit) nor = modellers (who had grown bored of modelling increasingly exciting = airplanes in=20 the same old grey-in-grey tones), chances were that the "low-viz" = paint scheme=20 was here to stay until the end of the aircraft area (2032).

Then, one = day in 2011, a=20 German modeller by the name of Adolf Pr=E4ltz accidentally discovered = that=20 mixing three parts of Future, two parts of Tamiya clear, one part of = Model=20 Master Sealer for Metalizer, ten parts Vodka, and an unknown quantity = of a=20 substance which Mr. Pr=E4ltz has been barred from disclosing by = contractual=20 obligations (see below) resulted in a coat with the most unusual of=20 properties.

The = discovery had been=20 accidental, starting out as an impromptu experiment in the field of = synthetic=20 mind-expanding stimulants, which in turn had been prompted by a high = degree of=20 frustration caused by inability to come to terms with the intricacies = of a=20 primitive vintage aircraft kit (the Academy 1/32 scale F-18 dating = back to=20 2003).

The = experiment as intended=20 proved entirely successful; however, the resulting loss of hand-eye=20 coordination led to most of the liquid being carelessly distributed = all over=20 the workbench - with astonishing results: the offending kit had = disappeared=20 altogether, and so had the workbench.

This, in = itself, was=20 nothing too unusual for a seasoned connoisseur of Star Trek reruns and = David=20 Lynch movies. What was unusual, though, was the fact that the = aforementioned=20 items remained invisible even after the effects of the stimulant had = worn off.=20 Way cool, man...

Initial = attempts at=20 exploiting the potential of this discovery were less than successful. = The=20 unsatisfactory outcome of an incident at the dormitory of a local = girls school=20 finally prompted Mr. Pr=E4ltz to cash in on his invention in a more = conventional=20 manner.

He = contacted a certain=20 Steve B., a known CIA agent running a  modelling web site as a = front end=20 - not too clandestine an operation, though, as the name of the website = was an=20 anagram of "Turn for secret CIA career" (or, as some contend, "Career = for=20 secret CIA runt"). With Mr B. providing the contacts, a deal was = quickly=20 struck with the US Department of Defense (DoD), resulting in the most=20 effective camouflage scheme in human history since the invention of = lip gloss=20 and rouge: the joint sercives' "no-viz" scheme.

The = stealthy invention=20 also made its way into other areas of modern life. A bionic software = company=20 called Microbesoft licensed the technology to incorporate it into its = popular=20 word processing application for neurocomputers, expanding the WYSIWIG = (What=20 You See Is What You Get) principle of earlier programs by adding a = feature=20 that had been on users' wish lists for ages: NYSINYD (Now You See It, = Now You=20 Don't).

 

 =20
Steve Bamford=20 will insert full sized version of photo Front.jpg = here=20
=20

 

The=20 Kit

The model = is based on the=20 current 1/48 scale Tamiyogram rendition of a vintage Grumman F-14 = "Tomcat" ($=20 10.500 / =80 5.000 / RMB 250). It contains markings for the Squadron = Leader's=20 bird of VF-628 "Cheshire Cats". This may be seen as completely = pointless as=20 these markings will be completely invisible on the finished product = (apart=20 from 4 national insignia on the top, bottom, and left and right hand = side); on=20 the other hand, the "completely invisible" issue has always failed to = convince=20 in some quarters as squadrons of Accurate Miniatures B-25 kits with = fully=20 built-up (and superdetailed) interiors prove.

No = aftermarket goodies=20 were used except for Manic Details "Late F-14 Cockpit" (MD-1349234, $ = 3.500),=20 Verblinden Follies' "Extended flip-flop Flap" set (VFFFF-14, $ = 15.000), and=20 Floppy Tires' "Floppy F-14 tires" product (FT-14V, $2.000). =

This is = the second edition=20 of the kit which comes in classic gray testostyrene (the earlier = version of=20 the kit cast in invisible plastic had met with only a lukewarm = reception from=20 modellers, some of whom have spent ages trying to locate lost parts).=20 Instructions are provided on the usual 3D holodisc.

 

Construction

As is = fitting for a=20 shake-and-bake type of kit, I assembled it by first shaking the whole = thing a=20 little, and then baking it in the Thermoform microwave oven after = adding=20 liberal amounts of "Mr. Sticky 10000".

One thing = I still don't=20 like about this process is the fact that it leaves too much manual = work for=20 the builder. I wonder why they still haven't introduced a method which = automatically disintegrates the leftover sprues.

 

 =20
Steve Bamford=20 will insert full sized version of photo Oven.jpg = here=20
=

 

Painting

The assembled model was = placed in the=20 Spray-o-Mat and first given a coat of gloss black acrylic which served = as a=20 base for various shades of Alclad XIV Metalizers to make individual = panels=20 stand out.

Then, several thin = coats of=20 Tamiyogram XF-9001 "Invisible" were applied. This product does not use = the=20 original Pr=E4ltz/DoD formula, but a less-than-perfect mixture which = leaves some=20 residual visibility as you can see in the enclosed pictures. =

Rumour has it that the = manufacturer=20 of Alclad will soon be releasing a product called Alviz which is based = on the=20 original formula.

 
 =20
Steve Bamford=20 will insert full sized version of photo Flying.jpg = here=20
=

 

Conclusion

Shake-and-bake kits, = Thermoform ovens=20 and Spray-o-Mats have taken the tedium out of modelling. Today even=20 lobotomised chimpanzees can (and will) produce contest-winning models, = which=20 is a good thing as it keeps them from molesting us while they take = time off=20 from running the government and the economy.

Photos = and text =A9 2004=20 by Ralf = P=E4tzold

------=_NextPart_000_00D9_01C4126F.AE6A7A20--